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Reckless Eric

Wreckless Eric: “The test results came through last night. Mine’s positive – I’ve got it. I felt deeply disturbed when I got the news and quite emotional. If I’m honest about this I’m vaguely / acutely worried in the back of my mind that I might suddenly go downhill and die, but I find getting older is a business of constantly facing up to one’s own mortality. A growing list of friends that are no longer with us appears to be developing and it’s becoming clear to me that one day I’ll be on it. So I stumble into moments of acceptance and find myself thinking that if this doesn’t kill me then old age or something else eventually will. Dying… it’s an ironic fact of life. When my mother was getting really old she said: ‘I’m not scared of dying, it’s just that it’s a great party and I’m not ready to leave it yet.’ I feel pretty much the same except that I’m not exactly not scared of dying – it’s not the being dead that worries me, it’s the manner in which it might come about. And I like being alive – I want to stay on at this party until some time in the small hours. The crappier I feel the more I’m driven to get in the studio and get things done. I’ve got albums to make. I decided a long time ago – and I’m down on record as saying this (literally as of last year’s ‘Transience’ album) that I want to leave behind an indelible stain. And I feel almost ok when I’m working on my recordings.”

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