Trailer

As for Young Adam, I mostly wish to offer a little advice to Mrs. Emily Nivola nee’ Mortimer. Keep your clothes on for a while. Please. I have enjoyed seeing her body verbally dissected by Dermot Mulrooney and I can’t really complain about watching her willingly strip naked to have a fling with an ex in gravelly mud under a truck. She is a beautiful woman and we now know that she makes noises from her nose and not from her throat during sex.

Great.

But I respect Ms. Mortimer as an actress and a human being (as well as her husband, Alessandro Nivola, last seen on the big screen baring his ass in Laurel Canyon) and I don’t want her to be reduced to this season’s piece of ass. (Similar note to the young woman playing Sir Tony’s first wife in The Human Stain… show us your pubic hair on screen one more time and you officially become the next Kari Wuhrer, not the next Jennifer Connelly.) Your other performance showing here at the fest, in Bright Young Things, has you playing a wild beauty that doesn’t like sex. That’s not enough to create balance. A character as complex as the one in Lovely & Amazing is worthy of nudity. But following it up as the hot chick who has sex in the mud is little more than a bunch of roles as the hot chick who has sex in some other unusual situation and suddenly, you are the lead of Showgirls 2. Don’t let it happen. Keep the clothes on for at least 3 or 4 movies. After all, we can’t all be Ewan McGregor. (And yes ladies, Mark Ruffalo’s penis does have a cameo in In The Cut.)

- Davvid Poland