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David Poland

By David Poland

Fantastic BYOB

fantastic-four-bernd eichinger

10 Responses to “Fantastic BYOB”

  1. Doug R says:

    Nine per cent? YIKES.
    Will take the family to see the 99% rated Shaun the Sheep this weekend. We are Wallace & Gromit fans back from when “A Grand Day Out” played the animation festival.

  2. leahnz says:

    armie hammer on the right there? time’s been kind

  3. movieman says:

    All the reasons “The Gift” is so good and wildly provocative (more “Cache” than “Unlawful Entry”) are precisely why it’ll probably get k.o.-ed by WOM.
    I’ve got a feeling that audiences are going to be mighty pissed off by that ending.
    Would love to be proven wrong.
    Surprise me for once, America.

    “F4″? Sad in some many ways.

    “Ricki” weirdly works despite myriad infelicities and the fact that Streep ain’t half the singer she (or Demme) thinks she is.
    Figured there would be more of a built-in audience for this than there apparently is.
    Guess even her fans have a hard time accepting La Meryl as a sixtysomething rock-and-roller.

  4. movieman says:

    “Sad in SO many ways.”

    Most especially for Trank.
    And Teller and Jordan, of course.

  5. Kevin says:

    FANTASTIC FOUR is actually okay. Not great (or fantastic ha ha), but not nearly as bad as it’s been made up to be.

    Well, it could have used more action and less lab scenes… And (Dr.?) Doom is the worst big-screen supervillain ever, no doubt.

    But I got into the whole origin story and found the characters/actors involving enough.

  6. michael bergeron says:

    The Fantastic Four were my bread and butter as a young lad, but the previous films in the FF canon were hampered by their, quite frankly, lousy effects. As I took the gentle memory of that early reading material and became a man I sought a perspective on my childhood heroes from a sexual point of view. Surely, Reed could extend his dick to boing across the room. And Sue would remain invisible save for her thermal heat pussy signal. Ben Grimm would slay with his rock hard cock and Johnny Storm could turn up the temperature in a casual sexual encounter by escalating the temp of his hard-on to degrees of hotness only felt by the gods of Hindu folklore. Now in the year 2015 I’m an old dude and just want to be entertained with snappy retorts and brilliant action sequences. The Fantastic Four does not want to play ball. At least not on the level playing field of finding what makes the clockwork of these people tick.

  7. For a while I thought Marvel was conspiring to destroy Fox’s ‘Fantastic Four’ but now I believe Fox made some mistakes along the way. Lucasfilm and Disney must feel validated for excluiding Trank from Star Wars.

  8. CG says:

    It’s kind of mind-boggling that Roger Corman’s FF movie had the most comics-accurate-looking Invisible Woman.

  9. Pete B. says:

    ^ It also had the most accurate Dr. Doom.

  10. John E. says:

    Didn’t realize Johnny was The Boy Who Could Fly.

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