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Kim Voynar

By Kim Voynar

Dear Internet: You are Depressing.

Dear Internet,

I think it’s time we had a little talk. Your negative attitude is seriously bringing me down.`Just this week, we had:

The London Riots, footage of which is beyond depressing. But even more depressing than the riots themselves: the overt racism and classism permeating many of the conversations happening in the comments sections of stories and opinion pieces on the riots. Oy.

Texas governor Rick Perry, He-Whose-Fabulous-Hair-Shall-Not-Be-Named, is apparently the anointed Presidential candidate of God, according to these people, who think they are modern-day prophets. Among other things, the various pastors who are involved with this group think that natural disasters are God’s judgement on the ungodly, that the emperor of Japan had sex with a sun goddess, and that the Democratic Party is run by Jezebel and a couple of lesser demons. And I’m not even making that up.

Casey Anthony is the most hated person in the US, beating out OJ Simpson and Paris Hilton. Quite an accomplishment.

Our House of Representatives appears to have been taken hostage by a pack of incompetent boobs. Oh wait, we elected those guys, didn’t we? On the plus side, Wall Street seems to be bouncing back a bit.

Sesame Street insists that, in spite of all appearances, Bert and Ernie are not now, and never have been, gay. They’re just BFFs who’ve been living together. For FOUR decades. Okay, whatever.

The US Postal service wants to lay off 120,000 people and cut benefits. No word of if they plan to reboot the Pony Express as a cost-saving measure.

In movie news, The Help is either Oscar-worthy, or it’s a racist film, and/or another example of Hollywood white-washing history. Guess I’ll have to go see it for myself and see what I think about that.

Fortunately, TIFF is coming up soon, so we’ll be able to bury our heads in films for a week and ignore the world. At least temporarily. Until then, Internet, if you could maybe lay off the bad news for a while, that would be great. Thanks.

One Response to “Dear Internet: You are Depressing.”

  1. Rob says:

    “But even more depressing than the riots themselves: the overt racism and classism permeating many of the conversations happening in the comments sections of stories and opinion pieces on the riots.”

    Lemme just head it off at the pass:

    “Harrumph blather thugs blah blah you Americans shouldn’t say anything about anything harrumph thugs thugs sneer we hate the darkies.”

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“There was somebody from Creative Screenwriting Magazine who was here earlier, and she said ‘Have you got any advice for writers?’ and I said, ‘Yeah, write standing up’. Because this time around, I bought a cheap little stand off Amazon, and I wrote standing up, because it’s slightly uncomfortable – it’s not so uncomfortable that you can’t do it, it’s slightly uncomfortable. And it means you don’t end up going on the internet, basically, because you’re there to do a fucking job. So I’ll write for 25 minutes… then I’ll go and play on the PlayStation for a bit. And I do this all night. I go nocturnal. And then I go back and I’ll write a bit more, and then I go back to the PlayStation, and then I go back… And hopefully by then, I’ll lose track of time and then I’ll be writing for fucking ages, and then there’s a point where you get excited about it. So my advice for writers is always: write standing up, and get Scrivener, and write in 25 minute bursts, and get a PlayStation.”
~ Charlie Brooker

“People used to love to call me a maverick, because I had a big mouth, and I’d say, ‘That bum!’ or something like that when I was young. Mainly, because I believed it, and I didn’t know there was anybody’s pain connected to the business. I was so young, I didn’t feel any pain. I just thought, ‘Why don’t they do some exciting, venturesome things? Why are they just sitting there, doing these dull pictures that have already been done many, many times, and calling them exciting? That’s a lie — they’re not exciting. Exciting is an experiment… That reputation keeps with you, through the years. Once the press calls you a maverick, it stays in their files. I’ll be dead five years, and they’ll still be saying, ‘That maverick son-of-a-bitch, he’s off in Colorado, making a movie.’ As if they really cared. You know, in this business, it’s all jealousy. I mean, this is the dumbest business I’ve ever seen in my life. If somebody gets married, they say, ‘It’ll never work.’ If somebody gets divorced, they say, ‘Good. I’ll give you my lawyer.’ If somebody loses a job, everyone will call him — to gloat. They’ll discuss it, they’ll be happy, they’ll have parties. I don’t understand how people that can see each other all the time, and be friends, can be so happy about each other’s demise.”
~ John Cassavetes


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