
By David Poland poland@moviecitynews.com
BYOEarthquake
If an earthquake hits Hollywood in late July, does anyone actually feel it?

If an earthquake hits Hollywood in late July, does anyone actually feel it?
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RT @aliciamalone: 'Behind The Candelabra'... The Boyfriend Experience? #cannes2013
RT @filmnickjames: So will we "buy" BEHIND THE CANDELABRA? About to find out #cannes2013
RT @AwardsDaily: Cost for one day of wi-fi using pay-to-play in the Palais instead of free wi-fi in press room? 15 euro, which is about $19.
DP: I should mention again… Omar is another great film from Hany Abu-Assad. Intimate, politically honest, but specific and not unfair
DP: Thoughts with @kimvoynar, whose family I think has all left OK by now… but tornadoes destroy memories too
“One of the things I wish I could do in my life would be to watch this film through somebody else’s eyes. I just can’t. I still see it as just a giant mess, and other people are seeing that it has a shape. That’s really exciting, because I still have a hard time seeing it clearly.”
~ Sarah Polley’s Greatest Wish About Stories We Tell
“Anyway, Hitchcock eventually saw a rough cut of High Anxiety. He enjoyed it. But he said nothing after it. He just left. I [thought he] wasn’t happy. The next day, about 11 o’clock in the morning, I get this enormous, beautiful case of Chateau Haut-Brion 1961. That was almost 20 years old [at the time]. I mean, it was priceless. And there were magnums six of them, in a wooden case. Haut-Brion. I mean, oh my God. I’ve still got three of them left waiting. I keep all the good wines.”
What kind of occasion is worthy? When will you know it’s time to go into number four?
“A real, real occasion. I won’t drink it just because it’s a family occasion. I’ll drink it with guys that know what a good wine is and care about, you know, exquisite wines. I have a couple of friends that know what a good wine is.”
~ Mel Brooks, Foodie

This is the third earthquake I’ve slept through. I’ve also slept through a few bombs too – like “Assassination of Jesse James”, “Lions for Lambs”…
I guess if you’re the sort of bloke that’s still asleep at 11:30, you were never meant for “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford.”
But hey! To each his own, eh…
SEE? FIGHTING! Do not hate this player for playing this game, and earthquakes are total and utter balls. Boo on them.
I got the shakes…now I need the fries….
Hey KT – some of work best at night. You know, writers and prostitutes…
I fancy myself both.
I wish I had slept through Jesse James. Who cares what’s happening on the BYOB when that Mummy thread is still going? For the definition of smackdown, refer to the remains of petulamanamalamadingdong films…
I enjoyed Jesse James quite a bit. Although I confess my eyes did slip closed but that could have been due to the rather heavy meal I had beforehand and the fact that the AC in the theatre was on the fritz.
The thing that amazed me though was the as far as I read, not one single critic picked up on the fact that Dominick’s take on the legend was not a hundred miles away from what Sam Fuller did with it in 1951… right down to the sequence where Robert Ford is in a saloon and a musician starts singing a song about the assassination of Jesse James.
Just watched In Bruges. What did people think? I can’t remember many people discussing it when it released in America. I liked it, thought Colin Farrell was great and the scenery was definitely top notch.
Also saw Up the Yangtze. I don’t see too many documentaries (their releases are so haphazard in Australia, trust me) especially at the cinema, but this one was fantastic. Really devestating, but hauntingly gorgeous to look at and to listen to. Funny in spots, but always with a sad glow. Those final moments symbolising (I think, anyway) the Old Child closing and the New China beginning were just sublime and so moving.
I really recommend it to you guys. Wholeheartedly.
child = china. i’m going to bed now, so tired.
I did see In Bruges. I remember thinking the trailer made it look like it wasn’t going to be much but then months later I ended up seeing it. I had forgotten my initial impression of the trailer until the movie started but some comments/reviews I read for it made it seem like it was good just not for everybody. I’m thinking, ‘Cool! Laugh at some really inappropriate stuff!!’ But no, it just wasn’t that funny to me.
In Bruges is one of the better films ever about a European city, that actually turns out to be PURGATORY ever made.
Saw American Teen. It’s good. Suffered a bit from reality-itis in that story won out over some truth. That said, it’s still worthy. Is there a reason why AT and the much superior Murderball didn’t make it? Besides the fact that mainstream America doesn’t like documentaries?
IO, what are some other films about european cities that turn out to be pergatory. Surely the list isn’t that long?
“Just watched In Bruges. What did people think? I can’t remember many people discussing it when it released in America. I liked it, thought Colin Farrell was great and the scenery was definitely top notch.”
It was one of those films that changes from “this’ll be nice” to “this’ll be good” to “wow, maybe ‘good’ is selling it short” to “I think I’m in love with this movie”. I think it’s a genuine sleeper and the best work I’ve Colin Farrell do since Tigerland. Finally, a justification for the attention being paid to the guy.
But of course, ironically, outside of people like us, nobody paid much attention to him here. Shitty world, great movie. And Brendan Gleeson is a GLOBAL treasure.
“Saw American Teen. It’s good. Suffered a bit from reality-itis in that story won out over some truth. That said, it’s still worthy. Is there a reason why AT and the much superior Murderball didn’t make it? Besides the fact that mainstream America doesn’t like documentaries?”
The title “American Teen” and the presumed aims of the filmmakers who would make THAT the title put me way way WAYYYYYYYY the hell off. Sorry, not commenting on the movie itself in any way, not having seen it, but that name itself just screams simple-minded piffle from the highest mountain tops. So much so, that I’d feel embarrassed to buy a ticket to it.
Camel: most European filmakers seem to make European cities appear to be like Purgatory. So the list may be higher than I originally thought. Nevertheless, I love In Bruges. It’s a little head trip of a movie, and it even did a guy falling from a building right. Gleeson also sold the hell out of that scene.
MY (LA-centric)AMERICAN TEEN anecdote:
I was at the “world-famous” Arclight Cinemas, which ostensibly caters to the UPSCALE FILMGOER, perusing the posters opposite the concession stand downstairs. One of them is the one-sheet for AT, which is OBVIOUSLY an HOMAGE to Breakfast Club’s very recognizable artwork.
Some gruff, profane, unpleasant woman, toting at least two SMALL CHILDREN, scans the American Teen poster, and LOUDLY proclaims, “That’s BULLSHIT! That’s the BREAKFAST CLUB POSTER! They RIPPED IT OFF!”
No one in the vicinity acknowledges this, beyond kind of cringing and inching away. Again: “That’s BULLSHIT! That’s the BREAKFAST CLUB POSTER! THAT’S BULLLLLLLLLSHIT!” Like, she’s actually SHOUTING this in the lobby.
All of the adults nearby kind of shuffle looking at their feet, so desperate for SOME validation, she starts badgering her KIDS, who couldn’t have been born within a DECADE of Breakfast Club: “THAT’S BULLSHIT! THEY RIPPED THAT SHIT OFF!”
Then the headed off to see whatever they were seeing, sure to ANNOY THE LIVING MOTHERFUCK out of whoever they were ASSIGNED-SEATED NEXT TO, which is why RESERVED SEATING BLOWS, because the ‘Light can’t keep out the riff-raff anymore.
Embarrassed to buy a ticket to a movie called American Teen? What about Mummy Tomb of the Dragon Fuck Whatever? Or American Movie? Was that one below your standards, too? Murderball? Honestly, if you haven’t seen American Teen you don’t know what the filmmakers were aspiring to. Lame.
To Lex: I slagged you off on another thread but that post I likey. Now I have to go check and see if you went APESHIT on me.
It isn’t the first time. Anyone remember the original one-sheet for TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2?
Hahah, yes.
Just think, somebody actually shouted in ALL CAPS right in front of LexG! Reaping what you sow and all that…
This comment is dedicated to Joe and christian…
BRITT EKLAND IS TOTAL FUCKING OWNAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!
HOLY SHIT. Some 1970 shit all being the hottest thing I saw all week. BRITT EKLAND COMMANDS YOUR ASS. I already knew this chick OWNED because in GOLDEN GUN she rocks that bikini, and because CHARLIZE THEROWN played her, but FUCK YES that shit OWNED and they totally paid homage to that in Layer Cake and my dumb ass didn’t get it at the time.
THE MOST AWESOME THING EVER is how CAINE *points* at people he knows he’s going to own, and even though I could just barely follow the plot and had to rewind each scene ten times because it was so convoluted and I had had a few Pabsts, that shit OWNED. I can’t believe that shit was from 1970, a FULL YEAR before the first official year of cinematic OWNAGE, or so I thought (Clockwork Orange, Dirty Harry, French Connection.)
An awesome sidenote that only a cinematography dork like myself would notice, there is a shot at a racetrack near the beginning where Caine meets up with that weasel villain prick, and the shots look exactly like the lensing in one scene with the RED COAT CHICK in DAMIEN OMEN 2, so I have to assume that was some of the shit Hodges shot before they switch directors of record.
Michael Caine OWNS your sorry ass, LexG. And guess what? He told me that in Get Carter he was playing “the ghost of Michael Caine” — that is, the guy he could have easily grown up to be had he gone ten minutes in the wrong direction, because he grew up with guys like that. On this blog, you read a lot of guys posing as bad boys. But trust me: Caine in his prime (and, hell, for all I know, even now) could kick major ass and not work up a sweat.
That rules. How hardcore was it when he banged that awesome ’70s chick in her swingin’ flat then watches the porn reel and gets all pissed off and flips out when she’s in the tub? FUCK YEAH. Paging Aaron Eckhart in WACK DAHLIA, THAT’S how you play that scene, sir.
Also awesome was that BLONDE WILLIAM FRIEDKIN LOOKING DOUCHE WITH THE ASCOT who Carter kept owning.
I have to wonder what Caine was thinking when he was on the set of the remake; I’m a huge Stallone fan and even quite enjoyed that take on it, but it looks so generic and whitewashed compared to the real deal. Again, this movie is from 1970?!?!?!?!?!?!?! I mean, obviously it’s of its time and washed-out and depressing as hell, but it’s more hardcore and bad-ass than 99% of what comes out today.
And remember what he told that chick: HER NAME WAS CARTER! LIKE MY NAME! (Because he was asking her the name of the babe in the porno film — his niece, possibly his daughter.)
You know, I joked with Caine once that, throughout his entire career but especially in the ’70s, he was VERY convincing at appearing extremely pissed off on screen. He agreed. Even into this decade: Look how pissed he is when he finds out in The Ugly American that Brendan Fraser is porking his woman.
Er, excuse me: I meant: The Quiet American.