You know, I love it when a commenter has a stroke of genius… or in some cases, just a stroke.
But seriously, folks…
The idea of the BAT HAIKU came up and, heck, why not give it a try?
Nolan up to Bat
So much more than a comic
But a comic still
The Joker is cool
Makes The Batman just a mouse
Dent’s teeth feel the breeze
Your turn…
And yes, there will be a prize. (We’ll figure out what it is in time.)
movieman on: Don Draper: Critic
movieman on: Don Draper: Critic
Don Lewis on: Don Draper: Critic
Keil S. on: Don Draper: Critic
Paul Doro on: Don Draper: Critic
palmtree on: Don Draper: Critic
Paul Doro on: Don Draper: Critic
anghus on: Don Draper: Critic
Paul Doro on: Don Draper: Critic
palmtree on: Don Draper: Critic
Trailer: The Wolf of Wall Street
Weekend Estimates by Man of Klady
DP/30: My Day In Video from Michael Cera to Costa-Gravas
Review: Man of Steel (spoilers)
“I don’t really think, Sean, that you need to know about my various sexual liaisons. Or that anyone else needs to. I did write about them. I filled a hundred pages of Moleskine notebooks with my one-night stands, my affairs. But I decided they didn’t belong in a professional memoir. First of all, these are real people we’re talking about. Many of them were enjoyable. Some were abject failures. My wife said to me when she read the pages, ‘Of what purpose is this in a memoir? Of what purpose is this other than to titillate?’ The point is, I never see them. It’s because I have nothing in common with them, frankly. And probably didn’t at the time. I could not provide a sensible reason why I married these women. The thing is, in the case of my marriages, it takes two people to fuck up a marriage. It wasn’t simply the fault of these women that I lost interest in them and realised they were insignificant relationships. Which is how I look at them right now–as being insignificant. I see them as blips.”
~ William Friedkin On Cutting Interviewers Off At The Sass
“I have to imagine from Mr. Spielberg’s point of view, the paradigm shift in the 1970s was just the new “normal,” a “halcyon era” from which we are straying in the 21st century–because theatrical exhibition is tenuous (as it has been since the 1940s), the home video market has dried up and people are watching pirated movies on their phone. Spielberg’s coming-of-age era was for him the halcyon period that the 21st century “implosion” will cause to go “crashing into the ground.” But he is wrong. The market for movies is actually diverse and highly segmented–although from the top-down movie industry vantage point and media punditry you would not think this to be true. Would we really mourn for Mr. Spielberg or ourselves if Lincoln would have been made for cable or had played on public television? Is it bad for humanity that cable television is creating wonderful, resonant stories in long-form series that people want to watch at home on TV (or streamed onto their computer)? I don’t think so, but it is a paradigm shift and it might affect people’s theatrical moviegoing habits. Televisions in people’s homes have had that effect for seven decades–it is not a new phenomenon. As Art House cinema impresarios we need to focus on what WE can do at our theaters and in our communities. It is not productive for us to fret over what pundits say or about what well-meaning filmmakers like the Stevens–Spielberg and Soderbergh–say. We should fret about what we can do in our communities. What we can do to support filmmakers.”
~ From A Response By Russ Collins, CEO, Michigan Theater–Ann Arbor And Director, Art House Convergence, To Mr. Spielberg
Fun!
The Bat Rules Oh-Eight
But Titanic It Is Not
Who Cares, Lex says OWNS
Batman pounds his fist
Gordon feels of fragile grace
Dent is lost to them
fist fights, explosions
spectacular car chases
what is not to like?
Pricy tickets sure
But six bucks for soda, please!!!
Next time bring a flask
Maggie G is hot
No collagen or implants
Wish I could quit you…
Despite a weak plot
Imax made the film worthwhile
Ledger stole the show
Dent needs a skin graft
Batman needs a throat lozenge
Nolan needs a raise.
The Bat takes much cash
In a down economy
Warner Brothers laughs
Titanic still rules
Over The Dark Knight’s attempt
And IO goes nuts
Scoot is a Japanese Girl
He enjoys Hello Kitty
as Titanic rots in hell.
Not to impune his character
but I own a Sailor Moon figure
won her in a trade.
Stepbrothers and The X-Files:
I Want to Believe?
I Believe in Harvey Dent!
yeesh, there should be no “the” above
Haiku has some rules
IOIOIOI
Know them or don’t “play”
Not Batman related, but I couldn’t resist.
thanks Dave. I’ll work on some as soon as I make my deadline. I hope a night with Javier Bardem is one of the prizes.
Da na na na na
na na na na na na na
na na na BATMAN!
In honor of the talk radio I heard yesterday…
Is Batman George Bush?
Larry Elder sure thinks so.
Shut up and enjoy.
Alfred remains loyal
Protects Batman from bad news
Michael Caine is God
would it be fitting to do a brief rundown of haiku etiquette for those who might wish to participate but aren’t into poetry? (i hope so cause i’m gonna):
three lines,
5 syllables
7 syllables
5 syllables
i want to do a beautiful haiku, but cynical haiku came to me instead:
behold the dark knight
soars as warner bros. laughs all
the way to the bank
I haven’t seen it.
Just not in the mood, I guess.
Bailed on X-Files, too.
Batman covers his.
The Joker uses makeup.
Harvey’s is revealed.
Batman in the end
Becomes just like Bokonon
Vonnegut better
black bat fights the dark
joker’s mind is melted like
the paint on his face
Tiny Lister owns
Katie Holmes is the hotness
Catwoman too weak
Nolan owns your ass
Sound design modeled on Heat
Michael Jai White back
J M C is douche
But IO is comic gold
And you should not play
Eckhart back in form
No “she looks like that dead girl”
Fuck, that movie sucked
Hong Kong sequence cool
Haterz just don’t know their shit
Hard PG-13
Vans and parking lots
Clearly modeled after HEAT
Critics don’t notice
2.35 to 1
Is best aspect ratio
Films shot flat don’t count
Batman clearly Bush
Movie says Bush says Bush justified
Third term would be cool
Odd that Batman hit
Since nothing comic ’bout it
Relentless crime flick
jason bateman is
arrested development
batman fans are too
Batman in Imax
Large format makes picture clear
Plot still makes no sense
The Bat Dude is hot
But just for today. Next year:
Lost Skeleton Rules!
Love the first two Bats
Too bad three will blow like The
Bat Ultimatum
Chris can’t quit the bat
There ain’t no reins on Ledger
Eckhart will be back
The joker twitches
Now Laugh mthrfckr laugh
Why so serious
The scarecrow is gas
Of mental horrors untold
Exile Ireland
Bat somber heart beats
Love not as deep as courage
Take back the good night
Gotham is batty
Tiny lister is ratty
Girlfriend bites the dust
Bats over gotham
Yankees can burn in hell, please
Mets in first place now
Madge is a yankee
A-rod has lost it big time
wife will sue his ass
So far Lota wins.
You mean besides our hearts?
A heatwave blast
through worldly theaters
black sweeps up the green
No Prince No Carrey
no flashing lights no nipples
that is how its done
Finnally found groove
after six times at the Bat
Grand Slam Homerun hit
Prayers for the next
Have Nolan placing Mirren
In catwoman suit
Constipation at box-office
This town needs an enema
Indy flushed away
Brutal so dark
An assault of the senses
As well as Bales family
Sad that they did that
To Aaron Eckhart
Oh which Knight to choose
Dark or Tale
One has Queen but the other has Bale
Sorry, that ended up being a rhyme!!
Bat feeling throaty
James Earl Jones or Barry White
Or too many smokes
Gut churning ballet
Set to two note symphony
Holds me to my seat
Child to young to see
Avoid the question
Who doth the bat hit
hardest? he of endless grins
or his momsy?
oops just realized I miscounted:
Who doth the bat hit
hardest? he of endless grins
or the momsy Bale?
There once was a man named bats
Who defends when the joker attacks
He brings the smoke and the noise
With his wonderful toys
But Dent still gets mentally cracked
(sorry, wrong thread)
Leaves childhood sweetheart
Spends nights seeking out, pouncing
flamboyant man, hmmmmm
Big hits clear the muck
Jeff Robinov gets one right
Broken clock right twice
Christopher Nolan
Along with Ledger and Bale
Gave the Franchise Life
Nolan owes me Hanes
Made me soil my britches twice
Back for fear; front – joy
Ledger is haunting.
He steals the entire movie.
So much Oscar buzz.
A flip of the coin
I have two faces, two sides
both lives disfigured
I love fine jewels
I steal them and tempt batman
he loves me always
gotham is darkness
crime feeds the vigilante
and saves the hero
joker runs amok
Did werner herzog film this?
self destructing fiend
Ledger wins Oscar
A sequel is on the way
Does this make you sad?
Bats falls eighty floors
Harvey’s still in the closet
where’d The Joker go?
Thread convoluted
Just like overrated flick
End misery please
Like deepening knives
One building, piercing note score
Best strings work since Jaws?
Indy disappoints?
Wall-E good, not fantastic?
Send in the clown, bitch
Titanic dollars?
This ain’t no four-quadrant film
My mom hated it
Creepiest request
in geek dress-up sex play now:
“You be Joker Nurse”
Not best strings since Jaws
Strings ripped off from The Shining
Nolan no Kubrick
Last I saw Shining
I was thirteen. Remember
only naked chick.
Naked chick was hot
But turned into an old hag
Jack good but jack not
VCR exists
To pause when pause is needed
Mission accomplished
VCR is old
DVD sixteen by nine
Play with us Danny
HOT BLOG GONE FAGGY
KEYBOARD THUGS NOW ALL FAIRY
EVEN LEX KINDA FRUITY
I was thirteen, dude
VCR was all we had
Are we off-topic?
Homophobia
Perhaps a bit too nervous
Yet oddly funny
candy colored clown
they call the Joker tiptoes
to my room every –
shit.
forgot the whole thing
five minutes after watching
just like “Memento”
struggling, wracking brain
to find one nice thing to say:
Thank God for Deebo!
last bat haiku…
The Gotham Joker
a permanent smile is carved
on The Man who Laughs
Is Bruce Wayne a bat?
gooble, gobble one of us
isolated freak