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David Poland

By David Poland

Scientology Orientation Videos

I don’t want to step on one of MCN’s bloggers’ feet, but Justine “Film Fatale” Elias sent me a link to one of series of Scientology recruitment videos posted on YouTube and I worry that – since they appear to be shot on video at a recruitment center – that they will be pulled off YouTube soon.
Justine actually sent them wondering if they were real. But it looks like a video camera job. And though there are a few things that really seem wacky, it would be awfully elaborate for a hoax with very little payoff.
I do not consider these pirated, in that the material is openingly available at no cost to everyone and there is no economic interest damaged by their posting. I consider them journalistic record. But, I don’t know that You Tube’s lawyers wil see it that way when they get the cease and desist. And YouTube is designed so we cannot download and keep any of this, so time may beof teh essense if you are interested. I know that I am.
Anyway, here is the link to the poster’s homepage. Scientology Orientation Video is all he has posted, 9 of what seems ot be a series of 10.
I’ll be interested in what people think of it.

22 Responses to “Scientology Orientation Videos”

  1. Melquiades says:

    Funny stuff. Hard to believe anybody could watch it with a straight face.

  2. Crow T Robot says:

    “Happy premise number three: Even though I feel like I might ignite, I probably won’t.”

  3. Nicol D says:

    Funny, perhaps. But we always laugh at ‘indoctrination videos’ when it is a way of life that we do not necessarily understand.
    Just out of school I had to work on corporate training videos for major companies with the theme of ‘tolerance and diversity in the work place’.
    They were far more creepy in that people’s lively-hoods depended on compliance with speech codes and codes of conduct that were very totalitarian and anti-human relations in my opinion.
    I do not say that to be an instigator; just that these types of ‘testimonial videos’ are done all the time with various subject matters. All of them are cheap, cheesy and lame. Everything from Fortune 500 companies to religious groups to universities and public schools to charities use them.
    We only laugh at the ones however that we do not agree with, but they all have the same purpose; to get you to not think for yourself.
    I must say I like how these made every testimonial equal with the generic titles of ‘actor’ and ‘actress’.

  4. palmtree says:

    10 of 10 is the best…some amazing one liners.
    You are at the threshold of your next trillion years. You will live it in shivering agonized darkness or you will live it triumphantly in the light…I’m sorry, but that’s the way it really is.
    It only gets better too…just wait for the little spiel about free will.
    Doesn’t look like a hoax…unless Travolta and Alley are suddenly making fun of it.

  5. jeffmcm says:

    Making fun of Scientologists is so five minutes ago. You are not X-factor.

  6. David Poland says:

    Isn’t X-Factor a cable show where Jeff Wells wears a spandex suit and tries to get budding girl superheroes to sit on his lap?

  7. David Poland says:

    Ohhhh… I just couldn’t resist… I shoulda, but I couldn’t…

  8. PetalumaFilms says:

    Wow. That was so insanely cheeseball, I too thought it was fake. But it’s not. How can people be persuaded by that video??
    In all honesty, Scientology piques my interest because it really seems to work for people. I’m sure it’s B.S., but if you can get some ind of inner peace or life management skills from it, it can’t be all bad.
    Then again, that video….oy. I like the part in part 10 where the guy says something to the effect of..”If you walk away from this video and don’t want to know more, we won’t stop you. It would be stupid, but we won’t stop you.” Classic!

  9. waterbucket says:

    Direct quotes:
    “If you leave this room after seeing this film, and walk out and never mention Scientology ever again, you’re perfectly free to do so. It’d be stupid but you can do it. You can also dive off a bridge or blow your brains out. That is your choice. But if you don’t walk out that way, if you continue with Scientology, we will be happy with you. And you will be happy with you. You will have proven that you’re a friend of yours…”

  10. James Leer says:

    Nicol, you were just on Jeff Wells’ blog bitching that people were acting “intolerant” of Christians. Is tolerance only a bad word when it’s about minorities?

  11. Lota says:

    most informational videos are cheesy or creepy. That was so creepy i might have to sleep with my stuffed bunny and light on tonight.[The language used is downright weird, though. Maybe weird enough to be a hoax.]
    Not only did I need a bath after looking at that but I had to blast my ears out with The Sisters of Mercy!

  12. Nicol D says:

    I know you are passionate about this. I respect that.
    When modern workplace speech/conduct codes tell a male co-worker that he can be fired for complimenting a female co-worker on the style of her suit on grounds of sexual harrassment; or a Christian co-worker fired for not displaying a rainbow flag on his/her desk, that is a very different proposition than me calling someone to the mat on Wells blog.
    No one will lose their livelihood and have their family starve by disagreeing with me on a blog, nor would I want them to.
    However, if you disagree with the hard-PC speech/conduct codes of most multinational corporations, you lose your job and your livelihood.
    That’s a very different proposition.
    I know you are passionate about your beliefs; so am I and that’s cool. But no one should have to lose their job because they disagree with you or me.
    I am not talking politeness here. I am talking acquiescence. And no multinational conglomerate should have the right to force one to compromise one’s own conscience.
    I have worked on these videos for major companies when I was just out of school and they turn the term ‘tolerance’ into a joke.
    What is most laughable is that on the videos I worked on…even the CEO’s who recorded the VO’s would joke in the recording room that they were BS…but they did them out of fear.
    Fear is not the way to run a company or live a life.
    I would hope you would agree with that.

  13. Stella's Boy says:

    How many Christians have lost their job for not displaying a rainbow flag on their desk? Is this a widespread problem?

  14. Jeffrey Boam's Doctor says:

    I dig how sexy Anne Archer looks in Part Eight

  15. jeffmcm says:

    Anne Archer! I was just watching Short Cuts last night, and she’s excellent in that. So I was wondering what happened to her and there’s the answer.
    Meanwhile, I think we’re all good at picking our oppression of choice. Fear is no way to live a life. It just depends on what the fearmongers are selling.

  16. Jeffrey Boam's Doctor says:

    Michael Douglas chooses Glenn Close over her.. Jesus he is a sex maniac! Good to see a Zanuck in there as well.

  17. Joe Straat says:

    I like how they always avoid discussing HOW specifically Scientology helps people. Just “buy the books and you’ll see.” Jesus, regardless of whether you believe him to be the son of God or not, always had some philosophies to draw people in. Psychology’s made some major mistakes (Much of its doctrine in the 1950s coming from simple Pavlov and Pavlov-esque scientists), but at least they evolve and their data is up to public scrutiny. Scientology from this video….. “Buy some of our books. You’ll see. And if you don’t, you’re stupid.” That is what draws me away from Scientology.
    And honestly, my workplace’s video on sexual harrasment was a lot more amusing (Well, until the last part where the guy goes bonkers and the camera gets all Fight Club-ish. “You are not the contents of your wallet….”).

  18. jeffmcm says:

    At least DP is an equal-opportunity copyright violator, between this and Kubrick’s Day of the Fight.

  19. Aladdin Sane says:

    I couldn’t make it through all of the videos…did they say millions of billions of believers worldwide in the first part? i’m going with millions, but billions would not surprise me.

  20. Lynn says:

    “When modern workplace speech/conduct codes tell a male co-worker that he can be fired for complimenting a female co-worker on the style of her suit on grounds of sexual harrassment; or a Christian co-worker fired for not displaying a rainbow flag on his/her desk…”
    Gross overexaggerations, as usual, of the actual law involved, which really does the argument, such as it is, no favors. Quid pro quo sexual harrassment involves workplace favors in return for sex. Hostile environment sexual harrassment involves a situation “where the harassment is sufficiently pervasive so as to alter the conditions of employment and create an abusive work environment.” Telling someone they look nice in a suit — or just look nice — qualifies as neither. If a company tells any worker that such speech is grounds for termination, they really need to get themselves a better HR person and/or employment law attorney.
    In fact, the second “example” probably violates the law, if any company actually had such a requirement. Somehow I don’t think such a company actually exists.

  21. David Poland says:

    Are you sure your last name is McMahon, Jeff?
    You sure go a long way to find a way to criticize me not matter what the topic.

  22. jeffmcm says:

    What does my last name have to do with anything?

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