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By Ray Pride Pride@moviecitynews.com

Woody Allen's favorite joke

pamplemousse rose.jpgAs told to Rob Feld in Written By magazine: Do you have a favorite joke? I have a favorite joke, but it’s slightly long. Do we not have time for it? You won’t like it. Try me.It’s about a guy who buys a horse. The horse seems to check out when he’s buying it, and the owner says to him before he buys, “I have to tell you one thing though. He’s got a bad habit. He likes to sit on grapefruits.” And the guy buying the horse says, “Okay, that’s the only thing wrong with him?” The owner says yes. The guy thinks, “He said grapefruits—all right,” and he pays for the horse. He’s taking it home with him. And they’re going across a stream and suddenly the horse sits down and won’t get up. The guy doesn’t know what to do. He runs back to the guy he bought it from. “I bought a horse from you, you tell me there’s one thing wrong, that he likes to sit on grapefruits. He’s sitting in the middle of a stream, I can’t get him to move.” And the guy says, “Oh! I forgot to tell you. He also sits on fish.” I told you you wouldn’t like it. I don’t dislike it, but why that one? … The Dada-ness of it. The absurdity of it is funny because it’s sort of like a perfect little joke. It encapsulates the utter meaninglessness of human existence and of the world.”

One Response to “Woody Allen's favorite joke”

  1. John R. Brehmer says:

    This joke is funny to me, I heard it years ago and it stayed. It’s so stupid it’s funny.

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“With any character, the way I think about it is, you have the role on the page, you have the vision of the director and you have your life experience… I thought it was one of the foundations of the role for John Wick. I love his grief. For the character and in life, it’s about the love of the person you’re grieving for, and any time you can keep company with that fire, it is warm. I absolutely relate to that, and I don’t think you ever work through it. Grief and loss, those are things that don’t ever go away. They stay with you.”
~ Keanu Reeves

“I was checking through stuff the other day for technical reasons. I came across The Duellists on Netflix and I was absolutely stunned to see that it was exquisitely graded. So, while I rarely look up my old stuff, I stopped to give it ten minutes. Bugger me, I was there for two hours. I was really fucking pleased with what it was and how the engine still worked within the equation and that engine was the insanity and stupidity of war. War between two men, in that case, who fight on thought they both eventually can’t remember the reason why. It was great, yeah. The great thing about these platforms now is that, one way or another, they’ll seek out and then put out the best possible form and the long form. Frequently, films get cut down because of that curse in which the studio felt or feels that they have to preview. And there’s nothing worse than a preview to diminish the original intent.Oh, yeah, how about every fucking time? And I’ve stewed about films later even more because when you tell the same joke 20 times the joke’s no longer funny. When you tell a bad joke once or twice? It’s fine. But come on, now. Here’s the key on the way I feel when I approach the movie: I try to keep myself as withdrawn from the project as possible once I’ve filmed it. And – this is all key on this – then getting a really excellent editor so I never have to sit in on editing. What happens if you sit in is you become stale and every passage or joke, metaphorically speaking, gets more and more tired. You start cutting it all back because of fatigue. So what you have to do is keep your distance and therefore, in a funny kind of way, you, as the director, should be the preview and that’s it.”
~ Sir Ridley Scott