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David Poland

By David Poland

The Island Shoes

DreamWorks’ 40 minute preview of The Island came with a pair of shoes… really cool shoes. It turns out, they are $110 retail and the other three colors that Puma’s “Mostro Garment FS” shoes come in are virtually unwearable by men without extreme fashion daring. Yet, they are incredible comfortable.
I guess we’ll see how long it takes to make my white shoes gray.

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57 Responses to “The Island Shoes”

  1. GrrBear says:

    Is that… velcro?

  2. bicycle bob says:

    looks like a new and improved velcro

  3. BluStealer says:

    Do they come in black??

  4. joefitz84 says:

    They look like comfy slippers.

  5. sky_capitan says:

    If you had them earlier, you could have run out of Badagascar a little faster (or is Jeff Wells the only one who runs out of theaters? maybe he’d like to see Eight Legged Freaks again with Scarlett to get in some practice).
    The Island IS the #1 movie I want to see this summer. If I give a Larry King quality quote, could I have a pair of those Pumas too?
    “The Island is the best action movie of the year!”

  6. bicycle bob says:

    does anyone blame him from running from eight legged freaks?

  7. Joe Leydon says:

    To this day, I can’t understand why Dave and so many other people thought “Eight Legged Freaks” would be a hit. I mean, this was a movie about GIANT GODDAMN SPIDERS, for crying out loud. Be honest: How the hell many people do you know would willingly subject themselves to THAT?

  8. BluStealer says:

    That doesn’t scream hit to you , Joe?

  9. David Poland says:

    I believe in big, dumb summer fun. Eight Legged Freaks was that… as was Lake Placid… as was The Rundown…
    Point taken.

  10. David Poland says:

    P.S. I know that The Rundown was released in September… but so are many “summer movies.”

  11. Terence D says:

    Sometimes counter programming backfires.

  12. joefitz84 says:

    September is technically the Summer.

  13. Joe Leydon says:

    The Rundown? Not bad, kinda-sorta fun. Lake Placid? Again, not bad. And Oliver Platt had some very funny lines, some of which I have shamelessly stolen and claimed as my own. (That’s one benefit of seeing movies that most other people don’t.)But Eight Legged Freaks? I repeat: GIANT GODDAMN SPIDERS! I’d like to meet the person who green-lit that. I have a bridge to sell them.

  14. jeffmcm says:

    Them, Tarantula, Arachnophobia, Mimic…all good movies.

  15. Joe Leydon says:

    Er, Jeff: Them was about giant ants. I don’t know anybody out there who’s afraid of ants. (Well, normal-size ants, anyay.)

  16. jeffmcm says:

    Yeah, and Mimic was human-sized cockroaches. My point is, I thought 8LF was nothing special but giant spiders do not necessarily make a movie bad.

  17. Joe Leydon says:

    Jeff: I’m not making aesthetic judgments here, sport. I’m saying spiders creep the hell out of people. And GIANT GODDAMN SPIDERS can empty a theater quicker than someone shouting “Fire!” If I were a studio boss, and someone came to me with a pitch for “Eight Legged Freaks,” the meeting would be a very brief one.

  18. jeffmcm says:

    Oh, I get it. So you thought the movie was too much for people to handle. Interesting.

  19. Joe Leydon says:

    By George, I think Jeff’s got it.

  20. jeffmcm says:

    Don’t get condescending, the whole reason you would make a giant spider/snake/whatever movie is because people don’t like them. Plus 8LF was sort of a comedy.

  21. Joe Leydon says:

    Jeff: I wasn’t being condescending. I was being jocular (and, in the spirit of this blog, movie-centric — I was paraphrasing a line from “My Fair Lady”). And no, I didn’t say anything about not green-lighting movies about giant snakes, giant alligators or even giant rabbits. But giant spiders…? Jeez, can you imagine some guy suggesting a movie about THAT for a date? He’d have to be somebody who scores even less frequently than I do.

  22. jeffmcm says:

    Sorry to be defensive.
    Obviously you’re more creeped out by spiders than all those other things. I can imagine taking someone to Arachnophobia on a date, though.
    Just like The Longest Yard is the most obvious date movie this weekend and why it’ll make a lot of money.
    Yes, crappy transition to try to make this discussion relevant again.

  23. Joe Leydon says:

    Will I sound condescending if I say: Jeff, I think you’re dead-on correct? No? Good, because you are. It’s also the most likely choice for older couples. Let me put it like this: I don’t think it will outgross “Sith.” But I wouldn’t be surprised if it comes very, VERY close.

  24. lota says:

    Hey, Joe (where you going’ with that gun in your hand?)
    I had a GIANT spider fall onto my back in Brazil and i have never been the same since…especially since it didn’t want to leave me.
    so a spider movie is a good date movie. I’d wrap myself around the guy next to me for sure. Unless he was Tom Cruise. heh heh.
    Scary (spiders, ghosts)= good date movie.

  25. Joe Leydon says:

    So what did you have to do? Get a judge to issue a restraining order against the spider?

  26. lota says:

    an Order of Protection against a spider? i wasn’t being metaphorical–it wasn’t a Studio exec.
    I said Brazil Joe, BRAZIL! not West Hollywood. Sheesh. If I said the spider threw a cell phone at me, then okay.
    When i realized there was a creature on my back I pulled out a .25 pistol. How embarassing. I thought it was a Yeti (it was heavy) and it turned out to be a spider.
    I ended up eating some kind of roasted spider and cassava for dinner and luckily didn’t know it til later. Kinda the consistency of shrimp.
    I hate spiders almost as much as flying.

  27. Joe Leydon says:

    So how did you enjoy “Eight Legged Freaks”?

  28. lota says:

    8LF was enjoyable nonsense despite presence of major irritant David Arquette. I have better spider stories than that movie.
    The spider in This Sporting Life bothered me infinitely more and was a brilliantly placed terrifying symbol.
    And the shooz…the reason for the thread. i was wondering where i had seen something similar. They are very similar to kitten claw spikes I had on the girl’s high school track team except I am sure those above dont have spikes in the soles. Mine had wrap around velcro too.
    Look like Good shoes for middle distance running.

  29. Joe Leydon says:

    You do realize that, on this blog, favorably mentioning a black and white movie that’s 42 years old, starring and directed by dead people, might qualify you as a snob.

  30. Duck of Death says:

    I avoided “Eight Legged Freaks” because the title sounded lame. I mean, who wants to see a movie about eight differently-abled persons with intact lower extremities? Now, a movie called GIANT GODDAMN SPIDERS I would totally lay down $8.50 for.

  31. lota says:

    Joe, I try hard to be a snob and had much Higher Ed to join the ranks of snotty Ivy Leagers and it doesn’t get me anywhere. I still fall off the snob wagon by liking stupid bad movies [Tam Lin and WIld wild planet are masterpieces], eating carb-laden Hostess junk food and using bad grammar.
    but underrated Lindsay Anderson did rock, may he RIP. Today’s dramatic indie snob filmmakers could learn alot from his personal subtlety in TSL.
    yes DuckofDeath, Giant Goddamm Spiders would be a better title, but then you’d have the Fundamentalists screaming for taking the Lord’s name in vain.

  32. Joe Leydon says:

    Duck: Scriptwriter Buck Henry once claimed that “The Graduate” would have grossed at least $100 million more had the producers been willing to use his preferred title: “I Fucked Her Mother.”
    Iota: Lindsay Anderson was indeed a master. It’s criminal that neither “If…” nor “O Lucky Man” has been released yet on DVD. Speaking of which: “If…” was released by Paramount, “O Lucky Man” was released by Warner Bros. Can you imagine either studio (not a dependant, the studio itself) releasing either film today?

  33. L&DB says:

    Giant ruttin’ spiders have NOTHING on SNAKES ON A
    PLANE! I am still shocked they sold that SNAKES ON
    A PLANE script. Let alone have Benjamin McKenzie
    and Sam L in it. That movie will be something
    special. Sort of like Flightplan, but with snakes
    in the place of the kid who really didnt die!
    I also ran across a huge WOLF spider once as a kid.
    Dear lord, that was an evil looking bastard.

  34. L&DB says:

    Oh yeah, those are some nice shoes. I think Schumi
    wears them, but in Prancing Pony red.

  35. Arc says:

    The “YOU HAVE BEEN CHOSEN” sticker attached to the shoe box makes this all the more surreal.

  36. Lota says:

    re. releases today–no…Lucky Man, If… and many others like Harold & Maude and A New Leaf would all be considered too weird and non commercial (despite Harold & Maude’s continued success) to be made these days. One-Two Three just went to DVD recently so I have high hopes many of the old horror and weird 60s comedies and dramas will follow.
    re. wolf spiders. A good-sized wolf spider is usually an older agressive female and they give a very nasty bite that will swell to the size of a large spud. See one again L&DB you best RUN.

  37. Dan R% says:

    I have a friend who only wears white shoes. I’m sure he’d love a pair. They look neat. Not sure if I’d wear ’em outside my house. I’m guessing that if they’re not already on eBay, they will be shortly from some savvy seller…

  38. Joe Leydon says:

    Lota: By the way, on the subject of ’70s movies that likely wouldn’t get green-lit today…. I just happen to have an article on that very subject in the next issue of Movie Maker magazine.
    Thank you for reading this shameless plug. We now return you to our regularly scheduled blog posting.

  39. Chester says:

    Dave, is there some kind of frighteningly detailed industry database for this kind of swag? I’m just wondering how they know what shoe size to send you.

  40. Lota says:

    Sometimes I read Moviemaker, I will look for it when i am in LA in a couple weeks and “grade” the article. 70% means you pass. I hope you are kind to Robert Evans.
    Thanks to whomever above mentioned SNAKES ON PLANES. My next trip will suck.

  41. jeffmcm says:

    The only way a Snakes on Planes movie can be successful is if it starts with a garter snake on a Cessna and it builds to the snake from Anaconda on the Spruce Goose.

  42. Lota says:

    I think the garter snake on Cessna would be a bigger disaster movie having flown on them often. There isn’t enough room on them for a tick to run free. A butterfly landing on the wing would send the plane into a roll.
    Please don’t meniton Anaconda again. awful movie. A movie about real anacondas is scarier (and makes SENSE).

  43. jeffmcm says:

    Oh come on, Voight was great in that movie.

  44. whahoppa says:

    It was a fun flick.
    LDB, were you trying to say Joel Schumacher when you said “Schumi”? Or someone I never heard of.

  45. Walker says:

    Antigravity boots?

  46. Lota says:

    Anacondas in real life are terrifying. there was no need to make an anaconda the size of a city block. And the boar! They are aggressive/nuts in real life. I didn’t mind eating them at all when I was down there. I bit them. Hard.
    I mean they went through all the trouble to film in the Forest. a lot of things were decent about the movie except the cheap 1950s feel mixed with authentic amazon didn’t work somehow.
    Voigt plays a good manipulative & weird bastard.

  47. Joe Leydon says:

    Lota: Evans is the very first person I quote in the story. He’s a gracious gentleman.

  48. Lota says:

    Good. He gets made fun of too much by too-smart youngster suits who have worse habits/taste (in movies and females) than Mr Evans could ever be accused of. I look forward to reading it then.

  49. L&DB says:

    Whoroppa, I meant the one and only true SCHUMACHER
    (sans Ralf who tries his best) Michael Schumacher.
    Seven-time F1 world champion and a guy who wears
    those shoes. Thanks to Ferrari being sponsored by

  50. Joe Leydon says:

    The white shoes ARE nifty, no doubt about it, but the best swag I ever got was a custom-fitted bowling ball during the junket for “Kingpin.”

  51. Mark says:

    Big Joe McCracken? You are now above the law.

  52. joefitz84 says:

    I Fucked Her Mother is a classic title. Too bad about nine million porn films have now stolen it.

  53. Joe Leydon says:

    Mark: Trouble is, the ball was — and still is — a rather bright shade of pink. My son was embarrassed, I think, the first few times we went bowling together. Of course, then he started cleaning my clock every time we played, and after that, I don’t think he would have cared if I’d worn high heels instead of bowling shoes.

  54. bicycle bob says:

    u need big erns wig too to make it really complete

  55. Joe Leydon says:

    Bob: It would likely be an improvement over what little hair I’ve got now.

  56. BluStealer says:

    Rock that wig, Joe.

  57. joefitz84 says:

    Anyone need a loan?

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