By David Poland email@example.com
One Reader's Oscar 2005 A-Z (not by DP)
Aviator will be regarded as the better movie in just a few years. Watch for it.
Beyonce Knowles is the new Rob Lowe: Only she was boring to the third power.
Chris Rock is so much funnier than The Oscars. Dave Letterman knows it.
Did anyone explain why there were so many empty seats at the Kodak?
Eastwood has directed 4 of the last 8 acting winners within a year. Not too shabby.
Freeman not having an Oscar before tonight doesn’t really make sense does it?
Giamatti is so much cooler than The Oscars. Steve McQueen knows it.
He needs to lighten up, that Sean Penn guy. Those non-conformists are all alike.
Isn’t a standing ovation at the Oscars just a big ole circle jerk anyway? “Sit your asses down!” is right.
Jeremy Irons gets the David Niven award for quickdraw quipdraw.
Kaufman looked kinda sorry to win, like he’s losing all that street cred.
Lynn Whitfield looks just like Sophie Okonedo.
Martin Scorcese keeps out-classing the Oscars year after year. Brava!
Nobody should have put Pierce Brosnon on that stage tonight.
Oscar hasn’t awarded a genuine best picture classic since “Schindler’s List.”
P. Piddy has the stage presence of a janitor… a very desperate one.
Quick, tell me, who won best actor again? Oh right. Him.
Robin Williams needs to stop teasing and just host next year.
Selma and Penelope presenting together was sort of like a bizarre racist SNL skit. “I’m just keeeding!”
That song from Shrek 2 is really freaking catchy.
Unbelievable how the best acceptance speech of the night was sung… and in another language.
Ventilators are for losers. Unless of course you’re Hilary Swank.
When did Peter Ustinov die?
X marks the spot where the presenters and winners stand. And it should never be in the audience.
Yentil’s probably under the impression that audiences want more of her now. God… help… us.
Zooey Daschanel was all over the red carpet. Now who is she again?